Lucky? No. Just Awesome.

When I was 16 my dad made a bet with me and my brothers that if we graduated high school with a 4.0 GPA he would buy as a brand new car. Well.....

Meet Sophie :)

(Okay... so this isn't really her, but this picture is a lot more epic than one taken from the driveway. Plus she looks just like this)

So did I graduate high school with a 4.0 GPA? Actually, no. That's why I didn't expect a car when I graduated 2 years ago (can you believe it has been almost 2 years??). I did however, graduate with a 3.9 and high honors. I was still pretty proud of myself considering I had more than a year of college under my belt: 33 credits. I was totally fine driving my little junker, Karalia, around and riding public transit. However, a few weeks ago she started to get sick. We all knew it was coming, but losing a car is always difficult. 

(I have so many fond memories with my baby - mostly of me caressing the dashboard and encouraging her to start or to get up large hills. I don't know why I get attached to things like cars, but I'm certainly going to miss her. We donated her to Kidney Kars. I was standing in the driveway when they drove off with her and it actually made my heart sink a little. Maybe pathetic, but hey)

My parents began talking about ways to afford another car and in my mind I was thinking another junker to share with Jeremy, maybe resorting back to UTA, and certainly not for awhile. So the day I pulled into the driveway to meet this beautiful thing, I was shocked. And when my dad handed me the keys and told me she was all mine I was even more shocked!

I began thinking that if my parents were really going to buy me a car they better be considering it Christmas and my birthday for the next two years or more! (I always hated those girls in high school who's parents bought them things like cars and they still seemed ungrateful. Exhibit A: my friend Angie). Now I was afraid I was one of them!) I decided to bring it up with my mom to make sure we were on the same page. Turns out she kinda guilt-ed my dad into rewarding me for winning the bet. She knew that had I taken 'easy A' classes I very well could have graduated with a 4.0, but I had decided to take college classes and still managed to pull out a 3.9. Therefore, I guess my dad justified buying me a used car 2 years late, rather than a brand new car right when I graduated. Well I'm certainly not complaining - I couldn't feel more grateful! It amazes me how much my parents take care of me, even when I think I'm becoming independent. Life could be so much more difficult, riding public transit is definitely a challenge, and yet my parents want me to have the best life possible and seem to do anything to give it to me. I only hope that I can be as incredible of a parent as they are. They sacrifice so much for me and I am eternally grateful. 

Now how do you thank your parents for buying you a car...?

Turducken Day

Why do we celebrate Thanksgiving? What is the reason for getting together with family and close friends to eat a big meal together - a meal in which we eat to much, take a break, and then eat more? It seems as though many people have forgotten that Thanksgiving has nothing to do with eating, and everything to do with gratitude.

"We have forgotten God. We have forgotten the gracious hand which preserved us in peace and multiplied and enriched and strengthened us, and we have vainly imagined, by the deceitfulness of our hearts, that all these blessings were produced by some superior wisdom and virtue of our own… It has seemed to me fit and proper that God should be solemnly, reverently and gratefully acknowledged, as with one heart and one voice, by the whole American people…"

- President Abraham Lincoln

I fear that with this track of destruction that the world has been running, we are slowly forgetting the real meaning of things. Christmas has become completely commercialized. Thanksgiving is all about the food. And life has become a struggle of fast pace and immediate satisfaction. 

Sometimes I feel I'm getting swept up in school, work, and the social life associated with college life - and I know I'm not the only one. That's why I decided to make a gratitude tree for our apartment. I challenged each of us, as roommates, to make a leaf and write one thing that we were grateful for each day. And today I can say that I'm grateful for the inspiration to make the gratitude tree. It gave me the opportunity to look back at each day, find one thing that stood out to me, and thank my Heavenly Father for his love and blessings. It's incredible how much the Lord gives us that goes unnoticed. 

Isn't it interesting that often we don't realize how grateful we are for something until it's not there? A working car becomes second nature to us - until we get a flat tire or it doesn't start. Our health is just part of our every day - until we get sick. Mom is just mom - until I realize how much I need and want her when she's not there, how much she really loves me when she stays up late to help me after I've had a meltdown, how much joy she brings into the family just by being her. Dad is just dad - until I notice that he greets me with a "hey beautiful" when I come home from school, he talks and laughs with me about the troubles I'm going through, he spends his hard earned money to make sure I'm okay and have the things I need to get through life. Jeremy is just a little brother - until I remember how much I love the great big hug he give me when I come home or am not feeling well, that he's willing to take me shopping to make me fashionable, that he stays up late to talk and giggle with me about the funny things in life. BJ is just an older brother - until I realized how willing he is to help me with a big project, how often he buys me little gifts just to let me know he cares. 

We all need to try a little harder to realize, notice, and remember all that the Lord has giving us - all the love He has for each of us. Maybe then life will be a little easier. Maybe then we will be grateful for the little joys in life. 

Take a Moment...

Picture Update!

Here's a quick update on my life through pictures!!

My newest 3D art project - Welding. Ba ha ha! Do I look like someone that knows how to weld? This is me and Heidi in our welding garb doing everything we can to avoid that teacher so she doesn't know we're both secretly taking our welding projects home to have our dads help us. My dad is incredible. He spent two Saturdays teaching me how to weld and helping me finish this project. I love him!

 My beautiful roomies :) We had a sleepover in our family room - moved all the furniture out and lined our mattresses across the floor. Sooo fun!

I love these girls!

My wonderful brother Jeremy helping me with a ridiculous art project. He's such a sweetie :)

The Before.

The project was meant to teach us about 'subtraction'. We made a plaster mold and then had to carve an egg out of it. The professor didn't say we couldn't use power tools, so naturally I went home and borrowed my dad's sander while everyone else chiseled away at their plaster like Michelangelo.

The After.

Which one is the real egg?? I think I did pretty good, but apparently my professor thought otherwise. I only got a B :(

Our family had the opportunity to go to Lake Powell with some wonderful people. This is Nikki. What a cute girl. We had a lot of fun together and I'm glad she was there!

 

A group picture of all the people at Lake Powell. My whole family, The Shiner family and some of their friends. Fun fun people.

Cliff jumping! Yep, I jumped from there :)

The party boat! Spent the whole week there :)

Emery's beautiful wedding! (Emery was on color guard with me all through high school and we were roommates at BYU and on the color guard there together. She is an incredible girl and will always have a special place in my heart. One of my best friends. Love her!) She got married October 20th, 2010 and I had the lovely privilege to be her Maid of Honor along with her friend Tajia. 

Married Men

(I don't really have time to blog right now, or ever for that matter. I should probably take a nap. But I'm blogging anyways. Gotta remember what happens in college when I grow up right? haha)

Tanner has been out for just over 2 months now and I figure it's time I start getting to know people, making friends and going on dates. I don't plan on just sitting around 'waiting' for two years - there's too much fun, too many experiences to be had (I will be here when he gets back though - no question about that. He's much too incredible to let slip through my fingers). Anyways... so a couple weeks ago I came to the realization that I hadn't been asked on any dates since I started school - actually I hadn't even exchanged dialog with any boys for that matter. I figured it was up to me to get things rolling. Boys. Sigh. I decided to start small, just take inventory of the boys I saw and then decide what to do. haha that sounds terrible... Here's how it went.

I looked around, saw a fairly good looking guy get onto the shuttle and I tried to make eye contact, then maybe I could sneak in a cute smile...(haha why did I try to give hints? Boys and hints do not work.) Turns out he was married, caught a glimpse of his ring. Moving on. This exact same things happened 5 more times. All married. Are all the cute guys at Weber married?? I guess I shouldn't be too upset, I'll be putting other girls through this exact same things in 2 years when they're looking at Tanner but he's married to me! Woot!

The most recent married man I met almost made me laugh out loud. I was walking on campus when I passed this boy, Jeff, whom I recognized from one of my classes. I gave a friendly smile and kept walking when he stopped and said he recognized me but wasn't sure how. I explained that we had class together on Tuesdays and Thursdays (haha I felt like one of those nerds that sits in the back of the class and knows everyone but nobody knows them... I didn't think I was that quite...) anyways, the conversation continued and he was really nice and seemed to be enjoying the conversation, as was I. I glanced down, no ring. Check. However the next thing I knew he was talking about his wife and how they're expecting their first child. I almost laughed but luckily it just came out as a big smile and I congratulated him. We talked for a minute more and then I headed to class. 0 for 6.

haha I think I'll just give up and hope there are some brave enough boys out there to ask me on a date. Am I attracted to married men?? hahaha. Oh you gotta love it!

Are you kidding me??

Today is September 27th - the day Tanner flies out of the MTC and heads to Canada. I had been looking forward to today since the day he left because I knew I would get to talk to him on the phone. I've tried not to think about it too much - I hate the idea of "waiting" for something better. I think we should just live in the moment and be grateful for each day. I'd say I've done a pretty good job considering. My roommate Kaitlin also has a missionary out whose mission president won't let him talk to Kaitlin at all when he calls home for Christmas and Mother's day (he doesn't even want her at Jordan's home with his family when he calls. Lame.) With knowing this, I knew this phone call today could be the last time I get to have an actual conversation with Tanner for the next 22 months. I don't know how Tanner's mission president will be, but I've been preparing for the worst. However, I was ecstatic about today.

When Tanner's flight plans came in last week they stated that he had to arrive at the airport at 4am and their plane was departing at 7. Therefore we planned for him to call me first thing in the morning - giving us a good hour or so to talk. I woke up at 5:30 (no alarm - I was just to excited) and laid in bed watching the minutes pass by, checking my phone every couple of minutes to make sure it was on, the volume was up, and that I hadn't missed anything. Around 6:15 I was getting pretty nervous... 6:30 still nothing... 6:41 my phone finally rings.

Here's how the conversation went:
"Tanner??" "Hey Kyra! How are you doing?" "I'm good! How are you?" "I'm good, hey... so our flight plans got messed up, someone at the church office building forgot to buy the tickets, so I've spent the last hour trying to figure out. Our plane boards in 20 minutes though so I can't talk, I just called to tell you I love you" "Oh... well that's okay (trying to sound like it was okay). I love you too Tanner" "Alright, well I'll try to call you later. Bye". And I sat there stunned. For real? That's it?? I climbed out of bed and left for class feeling like dirt.

When I got home at 10ish Kaitlin was awake and asked me how it went this morning, and of course I broke down crying. I love Kaitlin, she is sooo supportive. She talked with me for a bit, then left and I climbed in the shower. When I got out I was putting some stuff in my backpack when my phone rang. The caller ID said Illinois. What? Originally Tanner's layover was suppose to be in Detroit, Michigan from 12 to 2...? Sure enough it was him! Apparently all 12 missionaries were able to get on a completely different flight that had a one hour layover in Illinois and then headed to Canada. I was ecstatic to have him call again!! It was sooo incredible to hear his voice! He left me some recordings of him before he left but it's just not the same. Half way through our conversation the call was disconnected but luckily he called back apologizing for the bad pay phone.We talked for about 15 minutes total when the call was dropped again. I figured he would just call right back so I didn't worry too much, however my phone never rang again. I left for class feeling completely empty. Like I had been left hanging, waiting for something that didn't come. (Kaitlin told me that that first call is super hard because it leaves you bummed the rest of the day, and Tanner had even heard that and offered to just write me an extra letter but I was willing to take the chance).

Ya, I'm definitely bummed today. I've spent the last hour and a half sitting on the couch watching the videos he left me with tear filled eyes...(the videos definitely helped though). I'm such a baby sometimes. It was worth it to talk to him though. To hear his voice again was absolutely wonderful. To have a little bit of a conversation was fantastic. I just wish I could have left him with some encouraging words... at least an, I love you. *sigh* I guess I just have to be grateful for the little bit I did get. And Tanner did mention that he put a package in the mail for me last week so I should be getting that in about a half hour :) That will make everything better on my side :) I hope he knows how much I love and pray for him....

The Lord's Hand

Quotes from letters to Tanner
"I had an incredible experience last Sunday. The first of the week went very well. I was happier than I've been since you left and I even enjoyed work. Thinking about you just made me happy. Then starting Wednesday everything got harder. The next few days were long, I missed you terribly. Sunday was hard and I was holding back tears during sacrament. I pulled out my scriptures and realized that I hadn't been reading the last few days of the week. My itouch had died and I didn't want to get out of bed to get my actual scriptures, so I would just go to bed without reading or saying my prayers. Anyways, I couldn't remember where I was, so I guessed that I was in Alma 36. I starting reading and in verse 3 it says "...I do know that whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions and shall be lifted up at the last day." All of the sudden it just hit me. The Lord really has been strengthening me. I didn't know that He had been giving me so much strength to endure these last few weeks. Now I know how much I really do need the Lord in my life..."

I had another amazing experience of witnessing the Lord's hand in my life but it's written down in a letter to Tanner, not through dearelder.com so I can't just copy-paste it in here. I'll just have to wait till he gets home to read it again.

Life is CRAZY!

Oh my goodness! This last month has just been crazy! For one, it flew by! Everyone told me the first 6 months of having a missionary out was the worst part, but if the rest of the 22 and 1/2 months go like this last one, I have nothing to worry about! At the same time though, there were certainly really difficult days... I loving having roommates that know exactly how I feel and are here to support me. Kaitlin's missionary has been out for a year this week! And Alli's missionary gets home in like 2 and 1/2... but.... she found someone else after her missionary 'dear Jane'd' her... sad. I decided I should just post my letters to Tanner on my blog since that's basically what's been going on in my life. Maybe I'll start doing that.

I've moved into my new apartment! I live in Ogden with 3 beautiful girls, Kaitlin, Alli, and Julianne (one of which has brought to my attention the struggles of having a roommate...I don't know if it's safe to complain about such things on my blog though, for fear of her finding out, even though my blog is locked. I guess we'll just see how long I can stand it). Anyways! Here are some pictures!

The family room :) Against the right wall there is now a big brown leather couch and the smaller chair is closer to the door. The small shelves are just moved over. Isn't it sooo cute?? It doesn't look like a college apartement at all! (And yes, we had to provide all the furniture)

This is the entertainment center you can't see in the other picture. I wish I could claim all the decorations as my own, but alas, there are all Alli's. She's going to be a great homemaker.

Again, all the decorations belong to Alli. Except the vase on the bookshelf! Mine!

To the right of the family room we have the kitchen... don't remember why I didn't take a picture, and south of that is the den. (they are kind of in the shape of a 7) This is just one corner of the den where I put my desk and shelves. Kiddycorner there is a wood burning fireplace, and directly across from my desk are sliding glass doors to the porch.

Julianne and I share this room. Notice the green curtains :) Our room coordinates!

This is my side of the room :)

Just a close up on my favorite pictures :) Tanner printed these off for me before he left.

I LOVE living in this apartment with my roommates! So far it has been great! (except for the issues with she who must not be named). School is going great! I absolutely love every single one of my interior design classes. There is a lot of work involved, a lot of projects and a lot of waking up early, but it's incredible! College life is great and I'm loving every minute :)

Playing with Girlies

The weekend before school started I was able to get together with a bunch of girls from high school before we all headed our separate ways back to school. It was great to see them all again! The girl on the left in the yellow is my roommate Alli - love her!

Living for Letters

Tanner has been gone for a week... He left for the MTC last Wednesday. On tuesday I stopped by his house after work and I was able to say goodbye. We were able to go on a long walk and just chat and hold each other, but the end came too soon. I don't think there is really a way to prepare yourself to lose what feels like your second half, but it's something I had to endure. However, I wouldn't have it any other way. I want nothing more than for Tanner to serve a mission, it's just so hard to be so close to someone and then see them leave for two years. I admire Tanner so much for his strength in being able to leave though. The one thing that's holding me back from considering a mission is that it would increase two years of not seeing Tanner, to three and I don't know that I'm strong enough to do that. Yet Tanner was willing to put everything on hold, having faith that the Lord would bless him for his sacrifices.

This week has probably been one of the hardest weeks of my life. I'm trying to stay positive but it's hard, especially in the mornings when I wake up knowing it's another day that I have to endure. I think things will get easier once school gets started and I have a lot to keep me busy. For now I'll just be living for letters, doing my best not to think about the 2 years, 24 months, 103 weeks, or 17,000 hours left. Sigh...

Called to Serve?

Tanner got ordained an Elder today and I'm SO excited for him. He is the most amazing example to me and I've learned so much from him. I know that when he goes on his mission he will touch so many lives and have an incredible experience, and I hope that I will be able to have the same opportunity...I've been attending missionary prep classes every Sunday night for almost a year. I started going not because I was determined to go on a mission, but because I love the opportunity to learn more, especially about the gospel. And when I found out that Bother Lindon McKay was teaching it, I was even more exciting. Every time I go, I find I have more conviction to change who I am and become a better person; to work harder at reading my scriptures, to try and remember to say my prayers, to thank the Lord more often....

I have learned SO much from Brother McKay as he picks apart the New Testament, in the 15 mintues of class he calls "Footsteps in the Life of Christ." I've read the New Testament before, but I've never learned and understood quite as much as I do when he teaches. It has been the most amazing experience to watch the young men in that class go from being too timid to offer a pray, to sitting across from Brother McKay, pretending to convert him through their testimonies and knowlege of the scriptures.

Over the past few months I have often contemplated going on a mission, but I've never really known if it's something I should do. My patriarchical blessing says that I will have the opportunity of going on a mission with my husband someday, but I don't know what that means for me in the next few years...

Then today in sacrament I had an amazing eye-opening experience. Sister Tara Caldwell returned home from her mission and spoke today. As I listened to her, I couldn't help but notice the joy that surrounded her. She seemed SO happy, and I know she loves the gospel. As she spoke about the experiences she had on her mission, I felt an incredible desire to serve a mission myself and I now know that it's something I'm going to aspire to do. I want so badly to have those same experiences; to share what I believe, to watch other people learn and grow, to serve - with all my heart, might, mind, and strength, and to feel the Spirit and gain a stronger testimony myself...

Carlie and Joey

Tanner's sister Carlie returned home from her mission in Hawaii the beginning of June and is now engaged to a wonderful guy named Joey Maxfield. They dated before Joey left on his mission and while he was gone Carlie left on her's. After two and a half years they're finally together again :) :) :) and are getting married August 26th I believe. Tanner and I were able to take some of their engagement pictures today and I think they turned out great! I thought I'd post a few of my favorites.

They are just beautiful people and I'm excited to get to know them better.

College... GRR

What should I major in??? This question has been looming on my mind for just about forever now. I finally decided on Interior Design with a minor in Graphic Design, but I actually don't know if you can minor in that... So today I went to find out. I had a meeting with an advisor in the "Technical Sales" department at 11 this morning (Interior design at Weber focuses on that aspect a little more than I would like). The advisor pulled up my records on his computer and showed that I didn't have a single general complete. WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? I sent my BYU transcripts to Weber in November! I'm DONE with generals. And of course the advisor saiud he couldn't help me until I get those up-to-date. Why? I'm not sure, all I wanted was for him to tell me if I could minor in graphic design and see if my schedule for the fall was looking okay. Oh, and he also said he didn't know a thing about graphic design so he had no idea about that. I thought the two were somewhat related... So anyways, I had to walk clear across campus, okay so it was only half way, and go to the admissions office to find out what's going on. GRR :(

Took them 10 mintues to figure out where my transcripts were, but they found them. But for whatever reason they aren't showing up on my end or the other professors end of the computer. They said it would take a couple days for their changes to go through. Great. I planned this meeting on a day that I didn't work and before July so I could get my schedule to the manager asap. GRR :(

On top of that I found out that I have to fill out an application and pay a $10 processing fee just to get my AP scores to show up on my transcripts. What's with that?? They're on my BYU transcripts, can't that count as them counting at Weber? BYU is harder on you anyways. GRR :(

I then decided that I should contact that head of the Interior Design department, hoping she would know more about graphic design. I found her info at the computer lab, turns out her phone number just directs you to the technical sales people. I decided to email her and hope to hear back soon, and then went to the "Career Services" desk, hoping maybe they could answer my question about a minor in Graphic Design. Of course they couldn't! Once again I was directed somewhere else. I walked all they way back to the tech. ed. building and tried to find the director's office, but it didn't exist! It's suppose to be room 101. 101A-101I is what the sign read. 101A is where I was this morning... And of course at this point everyone is at lunch so there is nobody to ask. GRR!

Did I mention that I had worn cute little sandals with a skirt, dress to impress, and now I had terrible blisters on both my feet from wandering back and forth across campus. GRR.

I was so frustrated with the whole college system and how nobody knows the answer to anything - all they do is directed to somewhere else - that I thought I'd go check on the apartment. Don't even get me started on how frustrating that has been. No body was at the office, but they had some fliers. Rent went up $20 buck and the deposit went up $200! I called all 4 landlords, hoping to find out if an apartment had become available, and not a single one answered. GRR.

Did I mention it was 89 degrees today and I have no air conditioning in my car? It was sooo hot! What a ridiculous day! And did I get anything accomplished, NO. GRR! :(

A Painting of His Son

An elderly man raised his only son by himself after his wife had passed away. The older man was an art collector so their home was full of beautiful, expensive artwork. When the son was 19 he went off to war. While there, he lost his life saving the life of another soldier. A few years passed when a young man showed up at the elderly man's door. The young man had wanted to thank the father for his son that touched him and saved his life, but never knew how. However, he was an amature artist and decided to paint a portrait of the son. Although he knew this portrait would never measure up to the artwork the father collected, he presented it to him anyways.The father loved it so much that he placed the painting above his mantle - the center of his home and life. As people from around the world came to the man's home to see his collections of art, the very first piece he would show them was the painting of his only son that he loved so dearly.

Eventually the father passed away. An auction was held to sell all the artwork he owned, and people from around the world came. The auctioneer held up the first piece, the painting of the son. He opened the auction at 1000 dollars, but nobody would accept. The audience grew restless and insisted the auctioneer move on to the real art. The price dropped to 500 dollars, then 100, then eventually 5 dollars. Nobody seemed interested in the painting of the father's son, until a hand from the back of the group slowly raised. The hand belonged to the gardener - a worker and old friend of the father and his son. He didn't have much money and wasn't much for artwork, but he had grown close to the son as he watched him grow. At the selling of the painting of the son, the auctioneer closed the auction, announcing that in the will of the father, he left his entire inheritance to the one person that would accept his son.

Our Father in Heaven has promised us his entire inheritance to those that will accept his Son. All he asks in return is that we give to Him all that we can, even if it's just 5 dollars.

Stuck in a Rut

This week I worked a full 40 hours at the pharmacy! I'm a full time workin' woman :) However, I can honestly say that I don't really enjoy it. It's not too bad of a job, the people are fun, but it's pretty high stress and I'm constantly running around doing things faster than I can think somtimes. I can't imagine having to work full time for the rest of my life. Poor husbands :(

Tanner and I were talking about this exact thing just the other day. How do you not let yourself get stuck in a rut? How do you stay passionate about life (stole that from Crystal ;) thanks) when life gets so routine and monotonous? I wouldn't say that I'm a pessimistic person - I think I enjoy life - but I wish I was more passionate about it - that word just has so much more emotion to it.

As fall gets closer and closer, and with Tanner getting ready to leave on his mission, I can just see my life falling into a routine where I go to work, go to school, eat, study, sleep, go to work, etc etc etc. I don't want it to be like that, but I don't know how to not let it. I don't think I know how to just go with the flow or be spontaneous... Ah! I better figure it out quick or I'm gonna be stuck in the very rut I'm trying to avoid!

Montreal, Canada!!

Tanner got his call to the Canada Montreal Mission!! - French speaking! :)

After two and a half agonizingly long weeks, if finally came last Thursday, May 13th. Nowadays, all the paperwork is filled out and submitted online so the process is a lot quicker. The bishop even gets an email that says the call is in the mail so they basically know when it will arrive. But because of some misunderstandings, we all thought Tanner's call was going to be here the week before. When it didn't show up in the mail, Tanner drove to the post office to see if for some reason it was still there - it wasn't. We all hoped it would come the next day, but again, nothing. You wouldn't believe Tanner's disappointment. I mean, I couldn't imagine waiting and preparing my whole life for a mission and not knowing where in the world I was going, and then have my call not show up. So when his call didn't come again, Tanner went down to the Church Office Building to ask them (I thought he was going to get in trouble for that, but he didn't). Apparently Tanner's call hadn't even been reviewed at that point :( So Tanner left, overwhelmed with disappointment.

Then last week, Tanner got a call from the bishop saying it would be there Wednesday. Everyone got work off... but again, it didn't come. Tanner was heartbroken. I don't know how he stayed sane. But he hung in there just long enough, because his call made it the next day.

I'm soooo excited for him! Canada is just foreign enough without being too foreign. Montreal is a huge city and Tanner absolutely loves the city (he was really jealous when I went to New York last year). Tanner lived in Alaska for a few years, so he's somewhat use to the elements... The mission is huge! I extends from Montreal, around Quebec, and clear up to Greenland! It's going to be amazing and I hope Tanner loves it!

Although I'm excited for Tanner, I'm also nervous.... 2 years is a very long time. 24 months doesn't sound too bad, but 730 days sounds like an eternity! I'm determined to wait for him - it feels right. So I'll definitely date and do other fun things while he's gone so I can experience my independence and still have fun, but that's certainly a long time to go without seeing him at all. It will be good though. I'm excited to explore life, make friends, and hopefully travel a little bit before I settle down ;)

I can't believe it's coming so fast! Tanner leaves July 28th. There's a lot to do before then, and a lot of dates we have to cram in before he leaves :) This is the most exciting and most nerve-racking time of our lives so far, but it's going to be an adventure!

Playing House

All of the sudden I've become a mom of three... only for a week that is. Each day that I'm with these kids I realize how clueless I really am about parenting, and yet, is any new parent really an expert? Treyson, age 8, had his first baseball game yesterday, so like a good mom, I wanted to go and support him. I took a seat on the bleachers close to his team, Marissa, age 4, ran off to the playground and Britton, 10, was playing with a friend, so I sat, observing. I watched all these moms there to see their sons play while keeping track of their other little ones, and the coaches (really just dads) kneeling down next to the players giving them advice, when I came to the realization that we're all just wingin' it. Most of the parents there were not much older than me it seemed, and yet in the eyes of a kid, they're all experts at parenting. Yet none of them have training or special knowledge that makes them parents - they just have kids they take care of.

Do you remember being little and subconsciously you knew that Mom knew everything? She always knew how to play games you learned, she knew the right words to say, how to cook everything just right even without a recipe, she could always help you with your homework... You didn't really have to wonder why or how she knews these things - she's a Mom, and mom's just know. Well I guess I still kinda thought that. I've watched my older cousins raise their kids sooo well and I'm in awe as to how. I realize they have their challenges, but I assumed the knowledge of how to raise a child was handed to them when they had kids I guess. As I have friends from high school getting married, one of my first thoughts is "how on earth are they going to raise children? There's no way I'm ready to have a family yet so how are they?"

Today is only the fourth day I've been watching these kids and each day I realize how much I really don't know. I'm just making it up as I go, and I'm sure these kids think I just know, because I'm a 'mom'. All of the sudden my mom is my hero. The older I've gotten, and after having moved out, the more I've realized how much she really does. And yet she never gets a simple 'thank you'. Word that mean so much, and they never hear them...I haven't heard them once all week. I can't even explain how much I admire not only my mom now, but all moms.

I guess this experience of being a temporary mom came at just the right time - right before Mother's Day. I wish I could thank my mom for everything, but I guess there will never be a way to do that...

A National Security Crisis

My mom told me this the other day and I was so...excited (probably not the right word) that I had to go look it up. Apparently Childhood obesity has become a National Security Crisis.

Disclaimer: If you don't already know, I have a very strong opinion about obesity so it may be in your best interest to cease reading this post to not risk the possibility of being offended. However, if you choose to continue, be aware that my comments may be a little harsh.

(source: New York Times) A panel of retired military officers said that, "Weight problems are now the leading medical reason that recruits are rejected and thus jeopardizing the military's ability to fill its ranks." Apparently 9 million American youth (27% of youth 17-25) are too fat to fight. That's over a quarter of the youth in our nation! However, a nutrition bill is in progress that is suppose to improve school lunches. But get this! In 1946 the exact opposite happened. It was a "national security issue" that many recruits to the military had inadequate nutrition - that's when school lunches became a national focus and were changed to get kids healthier! Apparently it's NOT working! Honestly, I don't think changing school lunches will change anything. Look at all the people in this country. It's not just the kids that are fat, its their parents too. So changing school lunches will not change a thing when the kids get their eating habits from home.

Does anyone remember the State of the Union address? Michelle Obama said that her goal (for the year I guess) is to focus on, and find a solution for, the childhood obesity epidemic. So far.... I haven't seen anything come of that....

Whatever happened to the idea of Exercise?? I GUARANTEE that aerobic exercise 30 minutes a day will make you lose weight and be healthier. It's a proven fact! And health experts have been saying that for hundreds of years! (okay, maybe not hundreds, I'm getting carried away)

Okay, so some people have health issues that make it difficult to stay in shape. But give me a break! 9 million youth, at the age that the human species is suppose to be at the PRIME OF THEIR LIVES, are clinically obese?!? (I don't think the writers of Wally were too far off). It makes me sick to look around and see how obese people are. Now, I do realize that I'm blessed. I have a good metabolism and have grown up in a home where I can choose to eat healthier. But I still think that healthy living habits are a choice. Guess what? A bag of maybe 6 apples, is 2 dollars cheaper than a bag of chips. (Found that out while grocery shopping in college). Fills you up more too. Exercise usually causes you to eat healthier too. That's why I do both. It's not that hard - people are just too lazy to get up and do anything and it's easier to be obese.

I guess it all comes down to the fact that I believe our bodies are gifts from a loving Heavenly Father. We should take care of them. And being healthy allows us to do more and feel better. So I apologize for offending anyone... that's just my opinion on the matter.

Pharmacy Technician!

I FINALLY got a job as a pharmacy technician!!

I went to the Davis Applied Technology College (DATC) my senior year of high school to take a pharmacy tech. class so that right after high school I would have a good job with good hours making between $15-20 dollars an hour. Well the research and what high school counselors had told me wasn't true. Pharmacy techs are not in demand, they do NOT make that much money, they work long hours, and the DATC has a terrible class where you hardly learn anything and pharmacies in Utah know it. I've been trying to get a job for a year and haven't had any luck - until today!

I got a call from a pharmacy, The Medicine Shoppe, yesterday wanting to interview me. (I had turned in an application a few weeks ago, but they weren't even hiring at the time). I had my interview today, I really liked the manager, and she hired me on the spot!

I start the beginning of May, after school is over. Part time for training making $11.50 and after a few weeks - full time with a raise :) Right now I'm both nervous and excited... so we'll see!!

Family Ski Trip

On Saturday morning we headed up to Beaver Mountain to go skiing for the day. My Grandpa Bell works up there and generously bought tickets for us to go. It was gorgeous! We arrived around 10am and it was pretty cold, but with blue skies and no clouds in sight, it warmed up quickly.

Me and my boys! You can kind of get a glimpse of the blue skies.

It was my parents 28th anniversary on Saturday so I insisted we take a picture of them together.

Me and my dad :)

My grandpa worked the lift on mine and my mom's favorite run so we got to see him quite a bit.

The boys were definitely very enthusiastic about being there.

I had SOO much fun! We only go skiing once a year if we're lucky so I forget how much I enjoy it. I love gliding on the snow with the wind blowing in my face. I don't know what it is, but I love it!

Father Facials

Yesterday for young women's my mom had a relaxing evening with the laurels sitting in the massage chair, eating chocolate, and having facials in honor of Individual Worth this month. When she got home from work today she offered to give everyone a facial, and of course I agreed, but to our surprise, so did my dad :)

We looked so funny with our green masks on that I just had to take some pictures. It was, however, hard to smile when they hardened, which was terrible as I was laughing trying to get my dad to smile for the picture. My dad is just so funny sometimes!

A Little Stir-Crazy

Last week began as just a normal week - school, work, studying with Tanner, midterms :( but on Thursday things changed. I felt great all week, I had just gotten over a cold, went running a few times, was getting some good study time in for my midterms... I even woke up on Thursday ready to go on an early morning run and enjoy the weather that was just beginning to warm up, but for some reason I was extremely tired. I had gotten a good 7.5 hours of sleep that night so there was no excuse for my exhaustion, but I just blew it off, snuggled back up under the covers, and went back to sleep.

A few hours later I woke to a splitting headache in my occipital region with the pain penetrating down my neck. But with my Microbiology exam that afternoon and some serious studying to do (microbiology is just not my cup o' tea) I got up and headed to the bus. I muscled through my morning classes, but my body got colder and colder as the day carried on. Before I headed off to my history class I asked Tanner for his jacket and even borrowed a jacket from a girl in class but was still freezing and miserable. While Tanner and I were studying for microbiology during lunch before taking the test, I knew I had a fever, I had a headache, my neck hurt, couldn't focus, and had all the symptoms of the flu....

Feeling even worse on Friday, I would have given anything to stay home, but I had my Anatomy Lab midterm and being on the cadavers, I couldn't have them extend the testing period for me. I pushed through and immediately went home and fell asleep. The flu symptoms, headache, stiff neck, and fever over 100, remained all weekend, so Monday morning I decided I had probably go to the doctor.

A typical doctors’ visit, I assumed I had the flu and they would just give me some drug to make me feel better and I would move on. However, as the doctor walked out he asked the nurse to get a blood sample. I don't do well with such things... I don't mind needles or blood, but for some reason when it's being taken from me, I always get dizzy and have blacked out a few times. Monday was no different. I wasn't feeling well, hadn't been drinking water, and so the inevitable happened. Poor nurse; she was little, pregnant, but so caring as she helped me onto the table to lay down. She put a wet cloth on my forehead, and got me pretzels and water. I felt terrible.

The doctor came back in, told me I had tonsillitis and a bacterial infection, gave me some antibiotics, and couldn't stress enough that I get rest and WATER (he probably told me 5 or more times). He told me that if I wasn't feeling 100% better by Wednesday or Thursday to come back immediately. I said okay and left. Tuesday night I was sitting on the couch with Tanner, not really feeling any better but enjoying the company of a strong handsome boy I hadn't seen all weekend, when I got a phone call. It was the doctor himself calling to see how I was doing. After telling him I was about the same he scheduled me for first thing Wednesday morning to check my leukocyte count. With a personal phone call from the doctor himself I knew that there must be something up, he was keeping something from me. Mine and Tanner's minds whirled as we thought of things associated with bacterial infections and white blood cells - leukemia, meningitis, pneumonia... but we just joked that I could be dying and laughed it off.

MENINGITIS!

I got to the doctors' this morning and the first thing he had done was another blood test. I was prepared though and laid down from the beginning - still got dizzy and started to feel myself fading, but pulled through :) The doctor came back in with good news. He told me with my symptoms he was concerned about bacterial meningitis - the deadly one. He hadn't even told me! Apparently the average leukocyte count is between 5000 and 9000 and my leukocyte count was at 12000! However, today it was back down 7000. A lot of other numbers were down too. I found out later that on the way out he whispered to my mom that if ANY of the symptoms returned to come back immediately. Well I'm glad I'm in the clear... for now anyways...

Stick Couple...

My Stick Family from WiddlyTinks.com

I found this cute little program online and thought it was adorable! I'm SO in love with this boy and treasure every minute we spend together. It says 'my stick family' and although we aren't a family yet... one day...

Courage

I had to speak at New Beginnings for the young women of my family's ward tonight (my mom happens to be the young women's president - that's why I was chosen). The mutual theme for this year is from Joshua 1:9 I believe. "Be strong and of a good courage, be not afriad, neither be thou dismayed - For the Lord thy God is with thee, withersoever thou goest." I absolutely love this scripture. It also happens to be the seminary theme from last year that we picked from seminary counsel - ironic? I don't think so.

For my talk at this fireside, I was suppose to talk about having courage while going off to college and getting married; because I'm such an expert on these two areas. But I believe it was a very successful talk - I made my mom and one of my former young women's leaders shed, or get close to shedding, a couple of tears. Very successful. I wanted to share one of the quotes I found while preparing for this talk... this morning :) Of all the quotes I found, this was my favorite -

"You don't develop courage by being happy everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity".

The Cost of Independence

College just isn't the same when you're living at home...I LOVED living on my own, taking care of myself, and having a "sister/roommate" to talk to and hang out with all the time. Don't get me wrong, I love my family, but I want to have that college experience I'm suppose to have... If I could, I would find somewhere up in Ogden to live but it's sooo expensive :( And that's one of the main reasons I'm going to Weber, to save money. sigh...

Tanner lives on his own... He moved out and lives in Gail and Roxann's basement apartment by himself. His older brother, that comes home from his mission tomorrow, is probably going to live with him. I'm extremely jealous. Yet another problem with me moving to Ogden - I would be even farther away from Tanner :( sigh...

Why does money have to have so much control?

My 19th Birthday

For my 19th birthday, Tanner took me on the most wonderful date! We began by going to "The Roof" for dinner. (A very expensive, yet beautiful restaurant on the top of the Joseph Smith Memorial Building) They had live piano music played on a beautiful, clear grand piano, and the pianist even played happy birthday for me :) Tanner and I decided that one day we will be rich enough to eat at places like that all the time. We felt so grown up!

This was our GORGEOUS view! Taken right out of the window that was a foot away from us. I think Tanner was trying to tell me something... ;) We were able to watch the last part of the sunset as we ate. After dinner, we headed to Kingsbury Hall to see a soul music concert in honor of Martin Luther King Jr. (It happened to be Martin Luther King day and my birthday)

The concert was phenominal! I had an absolute blast. Tanner and I even stood up to sway and clap to some of the amazing music :) My favorite part of the concert was the mime choir. I had never heard of a mime choir before, but it was one of the coolests concerts I've been to.

On our way back to the car, we stopped to walk around Temple Square - it was absolutely empty and SO romantic. We took a lovely stroll through the square and stopped to take some pictures in front of the temple.

The picture of our feet was our atempt at trying to set the camera on the ground and use the timer. Like I said, the place was empty. Luckily some people walked by and offered to help. But I thought it was a cute picture anyways :)

This was one of the best birthdays I have had! Tanner always plans the most amazing romantic dates and I love every single one! I had SO much fun! I'm nervous to try and plan a birthday date for him that will measure up...

Lunch and the Library

Tanner and I went to Salt Lake last Saturday to go to lunch and then study at the library. Lunch was great! We went to Leatherby's.

We both had their delicious chicken fingers and then split dessert.

It took us FOREVER to get to the library though. I didn't think it would be that hard to figure out which trax to ride, but apparently it is...

We were so cold and tired that by the time we got to the library we were both in the mood for a nap, so we didn't get much studying done... Definitely felt that on our first anatomy quiz today. We both bombed it. Another saturday at the library tomorrow...