Called to Serve?

Tanner got ordained an Elder today and I'm SO excited for him. He is the most amazing example to me and I've learned so much from him. I know that when he goes on his mission he will touch so many lives and have an incredible experience, and I hope that I will be able to have the same opportunity...I've been attending missionary prep classes every Sunday night for almost a year. I started going not because I was determined to go on a mission, but because I love the opportunity to learn more, especially about the gospel. And when I found out that Bother Lindon McKay was teaching it, I was even more exciting. Every time I go, I find I have more conviction to change who I am and become a better person; to work harder at reading my scriptures, to try and remember to say my prayers, to thank the Lord more often....

I have learned SO much from Brother McKay as he picks apart the New Testament, in the 15 mintues of class he calls "Footsteps in the Life of Christ." I've read the New Testament before, but I've never learned and understood quite as much as I do when he teaches. It has been the most amazing experience to watch the young men in that class go from being too timid to offer a pray, to sitting across from Brother McKay, pretending to convert him through their testimonies and knowlege of the scriptures.

Over the past few months I have often contemplated going on a mission, but I've never really known if it's something I should do. My patriarchical blessing says that I will have the opportunity of going on a mission with my husband someday, but I don't know what that means for me in the next few years...

Then today in sacrament I had an amazing eye-opening experience. Sister Tara Caldwell returned home from her mission and spoke today. As I listened to her, I couldn't help but notice the joy that surrounded her. She seemed SO happy, and I know she loves the gospel. As she spoke about the experiences she had on her mission, I felt an incredible desire to serve a mission myself and I now know that it's something I'm going to aspire to do. I want so badly to have those same experiences; to share what I believe, to watch other people learn and grow, to serve - with all my heart, might, mind, and strength, and to feel the Spirit and gain a stronger testimony myself...

Carlie and Joey

Tanner's sister Carlie returned home from her mission in Hawaii the beginning of June and is now engaged to a wonderful guy named Joey Maxfield. They dated before Joey left on his mission and while he was gone Carlie left on her's. After two and a half years they're finally together again :) :) :) and are getting married August 26th I believe. Tanner and I were able to take some of their engagement pictures today and I think they turned out great! I thought I'd post a few of my favorites.

They are just beautiful people and I'm excited to get to know them better.

College... GRR

What should I major in??? This question has been looming on my mind for just about forever now. I finally decided on Interior Design with a minor in Graphic Design, but I actually don't know if you can minor in that... So today I went to find out. I had a meeting with an advisor in the "Technical Sales" department at 11 this morning (Interior design at Weber focuses on that aspect a little more than I would like). The advisor pulled up my records on his computer and showed that I didn't have a single general complete. WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? I sent my BYU transcripts to Weber in November! I'm DONE with generals. And of course the advisor saiud he couldn't help me until I get those up-to-date. Why? I'm not sure, all I wanted was for him to tell me if I could minor in graphic design and see if my schedule for the fall was looking okay. Oh, and he also said he didn't know a thing about graphic design so he had no idea about that. I thought the two were somewhat related... So anyways, I had to walk clear across campus, okay so it was only half way, and go to the admissions office to find out what's going on. GRR :(

Took them 10 mintues to figure out where my transcripts were, but they found them. But for whatever reason they aren't showing up on my end or the other professors end of the computer. They said it would take a couple days for their changes to go through. Great. I planned this meeting on a day that I didn't work and before July so I could get my schedule to the manager asap. GRR :(

On top of that I found out that I have to fill out an application and pay a $10 processing fee just to get my AP scores to show up on my transcripts. What's with that?? They're on my BYU transcripts, can't that count as them counting at Weber? BYU is harder on you anyways. GRR :(

I then decided that I should contact that head of the Interior Design department, hoping she would know more about graphic design. I found her info at the computer lab, turns out her phone number just directs you to the technical sales people. I decided to email her and hope to hear back soon, and then went to the "Career Services" desk, hoping maybe they could answer my question about a minor in Graphic Design. Of course they couldn't! Once again I was directed somewhere else. I walked all they way back to the tech. ed. building and tried to find the director's office, but it didn't exist! It's suppose to be room 101. 101A-101I is what the sign read. 101A is where I was this morning... And of course at this point everyone is at lunch so there is nobody to ask. GRR!

Did I mention that I had worn cute little sandals with a skirt, dress to impress, and now I had terrible blisters on both my feet from wandering back and forth across campus. GRR.

I was so frustrated with the whole college system and how nobody knows the answer to anything - all they do is directed to somewhere else - that I thought I'd go check on the apartment. Don't even get me started on how frustrating that has been. No body was at the office, but they had some fliers. Rent went up $20 buck and the deposit went up $200! I called all 4 landlords, hoping to find out if an apartment had become available, and not a single one answered. GRR.

Did I mention it was 89 degrees today and I have no air conditioning in my car? It was sooo hot! What a ridiculous day! And did I get anything accomplished, NO. GRR! :(

A Painting of His Son

An elderly man raised his only son by himself after his wife had passed away. The older man was an art collector so their home was full of beautiful, expensive artwork. When the son was 19 he went off to war. While there, he lost his life saving the life of another soldier. A few years passed when a young man showed up at the elderly man's door. The young man had wanted to thank the father for his son that touched him and saved his life, but never knew how. However, he was an amature artist and decided to paint a portrait of the son. Although he knew this portrait would never measure up to the artwork the father collected, he presented it to him anyways.The father loved it so much that he placed the painting above his mantle - the center of his home and life. As people from around the world came to the man's home to see his collections of art, the very first piece he would show them was the painting of his only son that he loved so dearly.

Eventually the father passed away. An auction was held to sell all the artwork he owned, and people from around the world came. The auctioneer held up the first piece, the painting of the son. He opened the auction at 1000 dollars, but nobody would accept. The audience grew restless and insisted the auctioneer move on to the real art. The price dropped to 500 dollars, then 100, then eventually 5 dollars. Nobody seemed interested in the painting of the father's son, until a hand from the back of the group slowly raised. The hand belonged to the gardener - a worker and old friend of the father and his son. He didn't have much money and wasn't much for artwork, but he had grown close to the son as he watched him grow. At the selling of the painting of the son, the auctioneer closed the auction, announcing that in the will of the father, he left his entire inheritance to the one person that would accept his son.

Our Father in Heaven has promised us his entire inheritance to those that will accept his Son. All he asks in return is that we give to Him all that we can, even if it's just 5 dollars.

Stuck in a Rut

This week I worked a full 40 hours at the pharmacy! I'm a full time workin' woman :) However, I can honestly say that I don't really enjoy it. It's not too bad of a job, the people are fun, but it's pretty high stress and I'm constantly running around doing things faster than I can think somtimes. I can't imagine having to work full time for the rest of my life. Poor husbands :(

Tanner and I were talking about this exact thing just the other day. How do you not let yourself get stuck in a rut? How do you stay passionate about life (stole that from Crystal ;) thanks) when life gets so routine and monotonous? I wouldn't say that I'm a pessimistic person - I think I enjoy life - but I wish I was more passionate about it - that word just has so much more emotion to it.

As fall gets closer and closer, and with Tanner getting ready to leave on his mission, I can just see my life falling into a routine where I go to work, go to school, eat, study, sleep, go to work, etc etc etc. I don't want it to be like that, but I don't know how to not let it. I don't think I know how to just go with the flow or be spontaneous... Ah! I better figure it out quick or I'm gonna be stuck in the very rut I'm trying to avoid!

Montreal, Canada!!

Tanner got his call to the Canada Montreal Mission!! - French speaking! :)

After two and a half agonizingly long weeks, if finally came last Thursday, May 13th. Nowadays, all the paperwork is filled out and submitted online so the process is a lot quicker. The bishop even gets an email that says the call is in the mail so they basically know when it will arrive. But because of some misunderstandings, we all thought Tanner's call was going to be here the week before. When it didn't show up in the mail, Tanner drove to the post office to see if for some reason it was still there - it wasn't. We all hoped it would come the next day, but again, nothing. You wouldn't believe Tanner's disappointment. I mean, I couldn't imagine waiting and preparing my whole life for a mission and not knowing where in the world I was going, and then have my call not show up. So when his call didn't come again, Tanner went down to the Church Office Building to ask them (I thought he was going to get in trouble for that, but he didn't). Apparently Tanner's call hadn't even been reviewed at that point :( So Tanner left, overwhelmed with disappointment.

Then last week, Tanner got a call from the bishop saying it would be there Wednesday. Everyone got work off... but again, it didn't come. Tanner was heartbroken. I don't know how he stayed sane. But he hung in there just long enough, because his call made it the next day.

I'm soooo excited for him! Canada is just foreign enough without being too foreign. Montreal is a huge city and Tanner absolutely loves the city (he was really jealous when I went to New York last year). Tanner lived in Alaska for a few years, so he's somewhat use to the elements... The mission is huge! I extends from Montreal, around Quebec, and clear up to Greenland! It's going to be amazing and I hope Tanner loves it!

Although I'm excited for Tanner, I'm also nervous.... 2 years is a very long time. 24 months doesn't sound too bad, but 730 days sounds like an eternity! I'm determined to wait for him - it feels right. So I'll definitely date and do other fun things while he's gone so I can experience my independence and still have fun, but that's certainly a long time to go without seeing him at all. It will be good though. I'm excited to explore life, make friends, and hopefully travel a little bit before I settle down ;)

I can't believe it's coming so fast! Tanner leaves July 28th. There's a lot to do before then, and a lot of dates we have to cram in before he leaves :) This is the most exciting and most nerve-racking time of our lives so far, but it's going to be an adventure!

Playing House

All of the sudden I've become a mom of three... only for a week that is. Each day that I'm with these kids I realize how clueless I really am about parenting, and yet, is any new parent really an expert? Treyson, age 8, had his first baseball game yesterday, so like a good mom, I wanted to go and support him. I took a seat on the bleachers close to his team, Marissa, age 4, ran off to the playground and Britton, 10, was playing with a friend, so I sat, observing. I watched all these moms there to see their sons play while keeping track of their other little ones, and the coaches (really just dads) kneeling down next to the players giving them advice, when I came to the realization that we're all just wingin' it. Most of the parents there were not much older than me it seemed, and yet in the eyes of a kid, they're all experts at parenting. Yet none of them have training or special knowledge that makes them parents - they just have kids they take care of.

Do you remember being little and subconsciously you knew that Mom knew everything? She always knew how to play games you learned, she knew the right words to say, how to cook everything just right even without a recipe, she could always help you with your homework... You didn't really have to wonder why or how she knews these things - she's a Mom, and mom's just know. Well I guess I still kinda thought that. I've watched my older cousins raise their kids sooo well and I'm in awe as to how. I realize they have their challenges, but I assumed the knowledge of how to raise a child was handed to them when they had kids I guess. As I have friends from high school getting married, one of my first thoughts is "how on earth are they going to raise children? There's no way I'm ready to have a family yet so how are they?"

Today is only the fourth day I've been watching these kids and each day I realize how much I really don't know. I'm just making it up as I go, and I'm sure these kids think I just know, because I'm a 'mom'. All of the sudden my mom is my hero. The older I've gotten, and after having moved out, the more I've realized how much she really does. And yet she never gets a simple 'thank you'. Word that mean so much, and they never hear them...I haven't heard them once all week. I can't even explain how much I admire not only my mom now, but all moms.

I guess this experience of being a temporary mom came at just the right time - right before Mother's Day. I wish I could thank my mom for everything, but I guess there will never be a way to do that...