College, Here I Come!

It's official! I've graduated from high school! It was definitely a long and bumpy road with my senior year being the most difficult, but I made it. Now I have the whole world ahead of me... I'm both excited and nervous, but I can't wait. I'm headed off to BYU in the August, majoring in nursing. I'm going to be rooming with Emery and I'm so excited! We're going to have a lot of fun. It's going to be hard to leave though, especially because Tanner is staying here and going to Weber for a year before his mission... but I'll be coming up to visit a lot :)

I'm so grateful for the experiences I've had and the people who have blessed me, this year especially. I have no idea what is in store for the next few years, but I can't wait!

Why do I love thee?

For all eternity is quite a while,
but I will walk with you every mile.
And if you love me when you say you do,
I shall love thee eternally, too.

But now I must share a little insight,
Of a wonderful boy, with a wonderful light.

Why do I love thee? The reasons explain-
My love for thee cannot be contained.

The light that surrounds you, is the greatest thing-
That always leaves me questioning
How I found such a wonderful friend,
Of which to stay with through the end.

You always seem to say the right thing,

Whenever I need some uplifting.

You constantly amaze me with your light,

And I never want to let you out of my sight.

The strength you posses is such a blessing,

As you lift me and help me when I'm stressing.
I only wish that I could return the favor,
And once in a while be your life saver.

I love you because of who you are-
With your dreams that will take so far.
And to those distances I want to come,
Wherever we start and where we come from,
I will be by your side through thick and thin.
And together, every fight we will win.

I'd like to think back for just a bit,
For I have some things I'd like to admit.

"tall, dark, and handsome" can only explain,

The physical attractiveness that you contain.

Yet it really is just the start,

of the beauty contained within your heart.

I love you because you are so great.

I've never seen you with an hint of hate.

You seem to posess so much love,

Of which I'm grateful to be a part of.

I know one day you'll make a wonderful dad,

And to be your wife would make me so glad.

And like you said, eternity with you,

Is one thing that I cannot wait to do.

The first time you looked at me with love in your eyes,

I was completey filled with butterflies.
And everytime you hold my hand tight,
My heart soars to unimaginable heights.

And those feeling continue every time I am with you.

Which is why I want to stick with you all the way through.

The closer I am to you, the more I realize,

I'm falling for you, and the man you disguise.

Yet through your trust you let me in,

To a part of you no one else has ever been.

Why do I love thee? The reasons extend,

But hold my hand through every bend,

And I'll always share my love with you,

As we travel together all the way through.

When Will I Love Thee...?

Beautiful prose, my dear love!
For your great talents thank God above,
So much love! I'm grateful to learn-
but now, my dear, it's my turn.

When will I love thee?
Let me fill you in.
I'll love you at the world's own end,
When the glass is half-full, or all the way empty,
I'll adore the little angel that the heavens lent me.

I'll be there, in your darkest hour,
white flag in hand, in the other a flower,
To hold you tight, and rub your shoulders-
I'll be here even when we're older.

We'll be together when wrinkles take over,
And rocking chairs make the best roller coaster.
Sweaters and sweat pants make the latest fashion,
There's nothing that can stop our youthful passion.

When you drop a glass, and it shatters completely,I
'll be there to help you clean it up neatly.
Sweeping and laughing, and a tad bit of teasing,
I admit that being around me won't be easy.

But I hope you'll stay with me, and stick around some,
Because, to be honest, you're the only one--
That I love like I do, and I'll prove it to you,
With each and every day,
That passes our way,

When will I love thee?
For all Eternity.

The Passing of Time...

This is the very first picture Tanner and I had together. It was on the band trip - October 2008. We were getting our smiles ready for Disneyland. It's amazing how fast time passes...

Yet another picture of us at Disneyland. The group of friends we were with wanted to go on "Indiana Jones" more than once, but I wasn't a big fan of it, especially with my back. So Tanner politely offered to sit with me. We found a cute little shaded area and just chatted. It was great! He's such a gentleman :) At one point our group of friends wasn't willing to slow down, even thouhg I had an injured leg and a cane, so Tanner carried me a pretty long ways. I felt terrible, but he insisted. What an amazing boy. hmmm :)

Tanner and I went to the Halloween dance together. For our day activity we carved pumpkins - we carved a pumpkin into our pumpkin :) Creative eh? It was a way fun dance and I enjoyed being with Tanner. It was our first 'official date'....

Making Christmas cookies with the Holm's + flour fight = one excellent night. I loved seeing Tanner with his family. He has such love and patience, and he's going to make such a great dad one day....

I spent a lot of the Christmas break with Tanner and his family. It was great! His mom snapped this picture of us before we left to see a movie. It turned out to be a really nice picture. Tanner is super handsome...

Our Christmas date. (see 'Christmas Carriage' post in January) That was an amazing night. I can't believe it has been almost 6 months since then...

Fog and a late night makes for amazing pictures. (see 'Flurry of Fog' post in January). This was one of the best times I have had, and produced the most amazing pictures. Tanner wrote me a poem about this night for Valentine's and it is amazing. It's framed and sitting on my dresses so I can see it every day...

Our senior prom together at the state capitol. What a fantastic night. (refer to 'Once in a Lifetime' post in March/April) I will never forget the amazing time we had together. Tanner is such a gentleman, a great dancer, and extremely attractive in a tux...

I can't believe how fast the past 7 months have gone by. So many things have happened and so many things have changed. Tanner and I have grown so much closer. We have never gotten in an actual argument - of course we have had minor misunderstandings and slight disagreements, but hardly. How many people can say that? I have loved every minute I spend with him and wouldn't trade it for anything. I love learning from him and about him and feeling of his amazing spirit and testimony.

Soul mates? I think yes... :) :) :)

My Biggest Fear

I emailed my love a famous poem, "How do I Love Thee" because I was looking for a way to tell him how I felt - in a flirtation way, and not being very good with words, I assumed he would recognize the poem, appreciate my efforts, and no think much more of it. It turns out he hadn't heard it before, and wrote me this fabulous poem in response. It's amazing how much more I fall in love with him every day.

Beautiful prose, my dear love!
For your great talents thank God above,
So much love! I'm grateful to learn-
but now, my dear,
it's my turn.

When will I love thee? Let me fill you in.
I'll love you at the world's own end,

When the glass is half-full, or all the way empty,
I'll adore the little angel that the heavens lent me.

I'll be there, in your darkest hour,
white flag in hand, in the other a flower,
To hold you tight, and rub your shoulders-
I'll be here even when we're older.

We'll be together when wrinkles take over,
And rocking chairs make the best roller coaster.
Sweaters and sweat pants make the latest fashion,
There's nothing that can stop our youthful passion.

When you drop a glass, and it shatters completely,
I'll be there to help you clean it up neatly.
Sweeping and laughing, and a tad bit of teasing,
I admit that being around me won't be easy.

But I hope you'll stay with me, and stick around some,
Because, to be honest, you're the only one--
That I love like I do, and I'll prove it to you,
With each and every day,
That passes our way,

When will I love thee?

For all Eternity.

I feel too young to be able to think about marrying someone just yet, but then every day I spend with Tanner, I fall for him more and more. Am I too young to think that I may have found the one? Maybe. But maybe not. I've always told myself that I would never promise a boy I would wait for him while he was on his mission for two reasons: 1. I don't want to put my life on hold and miss out on things because I'm worry about 'my missionary' and 2. I want my future husband to focus on his mission entirely, serving the Lord with 'all his heart, might, mind, and strength" and not worry about 'the girl back home'. I didn't know that I would ever have to actually make this decision, let alone how hard it would be.

Right now I can say that I want to be around when he gets back, and with all of the things that I have planned for the next few years, I don't think it will be that hard (despite what everyone else thinks). Although I am afraid of making such an important decision now, my biggest fear is of what will change in the next few years; before, during, and mostly, after his mission. But I know now that it all boils down to this one simple point: I trust Tanner, and I trust his testimony in the gospel. He has shown me that he is much stronger than I first realized and I am entirely amazed at the wonderful young man that he is. I can't even explain how much I have come to admire, adore, and love him. In conclusion, I believe that everything will work out the way that it's suppose to.

A Nail and a Fencepost

A father told his son one day, that every time he lost his temper to go hammer a nail into the fencepost in the backyard. The son willingly agreed and after the first day, realized that he had hammered in 37 nails. Everyday the son tried harder to control his temper and the number of nails he hammered in became less and less.

Finally after many months, the boy went an entire day without hammering a single nail into the fencepost. Pleased with his accomplishment, he found his father and told him the good news. The father smiled and said "I'm proud of you, son. Now every day that you don't lose your temper, I want you to go and remove a nail from the fencepost." And this the son did.

Eventually, all of the nails had been removed. Again, the boy went to his father to share with him what he had done. The father smiled, placing his hand on his sons shoulder, he said, "I'm so proud of you. But I want to show you something." They walked out back together and stopped in front of the fencepost, now free of nails. The father pointed to the post and said, "Every nail that you hammered into this post left a hole that weakened it, and can never truely be fixed. Although you removed the nails, the holes still remain, the post still broken. I can't tell you how proud I am of you of your accomplishments, but I want you to remember that every time you lost your temper, it left a hole in someones heart that still needs mending."

Once in a Lifetime

I went to Prom with Tanner last Saturday and it was amazing! We went to the Old Spaghetti Factory in Trolley Square for dinner which was delicious. The capitol looked amazing. Since Tanner and I have both taken dance classes, we were able to actually dance for a lot of the songs. It was so wonderful! Tanner looked fantanstic in his tux; oh baby! And he is such a gentleman :) I loved every minute of it.